Is The Year Starting With A Bang Or A Fizzle?

The New Year for me often starts out with a bang because this is when new programs are often starting.  In addition, the turning of the calendar is an opportunity to do things differently.  Start that new habit or use that new program that will make the year run smoother.  I love a new anything that is going to make life easier.  Yet this year I am not starting out with a bang, I am starting out recovering from the flu.  At a time when I need high energy I have none.  So instead of starting out with a bang I am starting out humbled.

I have come to admit thatI do not have the energy, though I do have the enthusiasm, to start this year as I would like.  The gift of the contemplative life is I get to say I don't like my plans foiled AND whether I have energy or not is not as important as whether I believe God's energy is enough.  An invitation to I believe that God can use this wrung out body from the the aftermath of the flu to be enough for whatever God has in store.  Which often involves more rest and saying no.   God doesn't need my rocket launch energy as much as my attention and trust.  Can I rely on the truth that it isn't always about what I can do or my agenda but what God can do?  That with my meager offerings God can do miracles? My work is to show up willing as I am where I am.
As I rest in this, I am actually glad this year didn't start out with a bang.  Maybe starting the year humbled is an invitation to live the year humble. It is because of showing up to practices like the groups offered and spiritual direction that I am able to even glimpse these insights.  This is why I get so excited to spread the word about these groups.  They aren't here so one can make a million or gain control over their life, they are here to help all of us learn to pay attention, follow and show up.  To recognize the gift of being humble.  So, I submit these offering to you and wish you a humbling New Year.

Amanda PetersenComment